The Dolly Chronicles Part One: Dollies in Vietnam

(This post was originally written in February 2004)
When last we left The Dollies they were wearing HUGE unsightly hats and driving off to the strains of Louis Armstrong, somewhere in Savannah,Georgia. We meet up again in the southern coast of Vietnam. We take you now to a tour already in progress...We left early from Saigon (Ashley had been there 6 days by herself and was ready to get out of the heat) - 7:15 in the morning to catch a 5 hour bus to Phan Thiet, where we met up with Matt (Allen) and Alice (Byers) and their biking trip, already in progress. When we got on the bus there were only two seats left, and one was in the middle of the very last row.

Joy.

Rapture.

But the guy who Courtney ended up sitting next to was very nice and ended up switching with Ashley so that the Dollies could sit next to each other and gaze out at the lovely Vietnam landscape (moped crashes, trash in the street, abandoned houses, random roadside rest stops without any walls, rice paddies, the normal stuff).

Arrived in Phan Thiet at about 1pm and promptly signed up for a massage. Had lunch and laid out by the pool, got the massage and met up with Matt and Alice. The Vietnamese Tour Guide and Drivers were really happy to see us and meet Courtney and they ended up taking us to dinner at this local place. Had pretty good food, but don't really remember what it was as there appeared a giant bottle of Johnny Walker Red Label on the table as soon as we were seated. The guides had brought it. They poured food into our bowls and booze into our glasses and we tried our best to make conversation
despite the extremely loud singing emanating from a horrible woman in a black evening gown who kept asking her band to turn up the volume.

The next day, we got up, snuck out and commandeered some bicycles to ride out to Mui Ne beach. arrived and immediately settled ourselves into the sand with some cold Tiger Beers. Swam in the South China Sea. Got sunburnt. Went home smelling like the ambient air (which in Phant Thiet means smelling like nuoc mam - fish sauce).

Got up the NEXT day and had a leisurely breakfast. Decided to skip the "local trolley by the cow" also known as the "beef trolley." Picture a hay ride, but no hay, and a cow instead of a horse. And also, its on the beach. We had signed up for a tourist minibus to Nha Trang ($5 a person) that was supposed to pick us up at 1pm. At 2:15, our bus pulled away and we were headed north. 500 honks, 300 potholes, and one restroom break (squat pot) later, we arrived tired and famished in Nha Trang. We decided to take the train the rest of the way to the central coast. At $20 a person for an overnight on a soft sleeper, it beat the $6 13-hour bus ride that was our
alternative.

So we came to Hoi An on the overnight train (Reunification Express) on a sleeper berth that had FILTHY mattresses (luckily, they came around and gave us sheets - Courtney also brought her own sheet and Ashley had two sarongs... - we were in the cabin with two random vietnamese men - one of whom was a TOTAL SNORRY McSNORE PANTS!) we left at 9pm and got in at about 9am this morning. looking our best. this was after declining the complimentary breakfast that was passed out at around 6:30am - a cold pickled chicken salad of some sort...the other interesting component was the bathroom. Squat pots are challenging enough when they AREN'T moving...

So that was interesting...getting off the train, we sort of bonded with 3 Australians who were also going to Hoi An ['cause the train actually let us off at Da Nang), so we split a taxi to a hotel that ended up costing us about $3 apiece for 30 km! he ended up taking us to a pretty nice hotel where we're staying for $15 a night :) not bad, eh? and email here isn't expensive, and you know we are junkies...

So that is the update on our travels...I think we're headed to hue tomorrow for two days, then we'll fly back to Saigon (for $60 a piece, MUCH faster (and safer...) than bus or train).

Oh, and also, we woke up at 6 this morning on the train 'cause the intercom was BLASTING vietnamese music. this continued until 9, when we got off of the train. very funny...especially once we figured out how to turn it off, but it continued to get louder and louder from the other cars...they were bound and determined that we were ALL going to enjoy it.

So anyhow, here we are with a few days to spare and hopefully getting lots of bizarre clothing made for us. Maybe we'll see some pagodas or something too.